Originally posted by GeoffWilliams
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It's important don_budge realizes people like Bill Tilden aren't just interested in little boys, they will also chase after little girls.
Basically, their animals who will chase after whatever weak prey they can get their hands on.
My wife is pretty strict girl and she has some ground rules:
(1) Never allow a coach to yell or discipline our children.
(2) All coaches - mentor - teacher - instructor are to be seen as "special assistants and consultants" to us. If they are not comfortable with this role, than they'll need to find other clients. Those who are the best in their fields will understand our model.
(3) In terms of tennis, everyone's role is to make the athlete not need them. Hell, it applies to everything else as well. I take pride when my young one shows me she's independent!
(4) It's all about finding people who understand the team-work philosophy.
I will say this, my eight year old daughter is the most uncoachable tennis player in the world right now. And, I have set her up this way on purpose. She will not blindly do what anyone wants her to do. I've taught her to think for herself, do what is in her best interests, think long and hard about how recommendations can be implemented into her long term goals and press forward when she wants to press forward. Don't be rushed, and if someone rushes you, slow down, as development will happen when it happens.
I have a young man is a hitting partner with us named Dimmer, he is 25 and a smart businessman. He came to me and said, "You know, she does not listen to me, and she kind of wants to do what she wants to do. Everything is always a very long discussion and a big experimentation."
I said, "Well, great, she is just like you. That's why I picked you. You never listen to anyone either. When I tell you something, you don't buy into it. Dimmer takes one week to think it over. Don't tell me different because I know your dad, and I am close friends with your ex-coach who worked with you when you were 16 who said you were the most exasperating client he ever had! Yet, you drive a $75,000 car, own a restaurant, three squash courts, one tennis court and a kids playground. I am not sure why you work for me from Monday to Friday from 7 am to noon for $125 a week?"
Anyways he said to me: "The program here interests me A LOT. I have a four month old kid, hey you and I are buddies, and we have such a fun time! This makes sense. I have always run my own show and expected to be treated like an adult. Yes, I am difficult, however, the true mentors and great instructors knew how to handle me, make it work and as a result I fast tracked every process better than my peers who had more brains, we're better socialized, had better grades and we're viewed as good little boys and girls who did as they were told. Truth be told, they stagnated and I didn't. So, I get now why you send us for sushi 2-3 times a week and cancel our practices. I understand now I need to be more deliberate, let her make choices, empower her and make her see, and think about what it will be like for her and her countrymen when she is a world number one from Ukraine in 8 years."
So, don_budge, don't worry, we will get ourselves to the right people and the correct time, and incorporate them as required. We value team driven, and especially athlete driven dialogue.
And if tennis doesn't work out I am pretty sure I will have another Dimmer, a kid who has the tool set to succeed anywhere, anytime and any place. He might not know much about tennis, or have the best strokes, however, he's passionate, and that's more important than great early instruction according to many scientific research papers done by experts.
Dimmer also lives life well, manages his own great team, and has five hours a day when he can come on the court and be a kid. I hope my daughter isn't caught up in an adults world when she is 25, because childhood is something we should all have from ages 1 to 90 when we die.
don_budge, sorry for getting angry at you yesterday, hopefully my young one doesn't get her daddy's bad hockey temperament for the sake of men, woman and children everywhere on planet earth.
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